KKKssssssHHHHHHHhhht.... Roger, this thing working?

Alright, first transmission of the season.

Let's talk about wearing women's wigs and pretending to be a girl. 

What if I told you I cross-dressed? I bet immediately you would think I was either 1: A social outcast (You fascist pig!) or 2: A regular person just like anyone else who liked to wear woman's clothes (You pansy-ass liberal!)

Well you would BOTH be wrong. Dressing up as a woman is a great way to catch your enemies off guard and lure them into an ambush.  So by pretending to be a girl, I have become an ASSASSIN.

Let's learn more- Tracking your prey.

CJ had been snuggling up with Jonna, ALL THE TIME.  I noticed this information, memorized it and logged it immediately.  Now to be fair, Jonna did hold eveerrryyyones hand and snuggle up with everybody, but CJ got a certain special attention it seemed. Was it his airbrushed good looks? The long blonde hair? The muscles?

Whatever it was, above all it was a WEAKNESS to be EXPLOITED.

So, when the opportunity to strike presented itself, I realized I had a limited window to make the kill.

After donning the garb of CJ's intended awkward-snuggle-fuck, I covered myself in her scent and approached my prey.

I attempted to enter the hammock and gracefully as possible, imitating the movements of the female I had disguised myself as. CJ put his arm around me. I knew he was falling for it, now the only thing I had to do was not laugh. I realized, too late, that I didn't exactly know what to do once I was *IN* the hammock.  I mean, what if he never noticed it was me? What if I ended up snuggling with CJ for an hour? What if he got a boner on my leg!?! EWWW, JESUS. Crisis was almost at hand.

Fortunately, CJ did the job for me and did his patented nose-rub. For those of you who don't know, CJ likes to rub his nose on girls. I don't know why. He should use a tissue, doing it on women is just plain rude. But either way, he puts the tip of his nose on the nape of my neck and ever so softly goes "mmm."

WELP that just about did it for me and I couldn't hold it in any longer. I cracked up, leaving CJ bewildered, confused, unsure about his sexual orientation... and defeated.

Ahh... ma petite chou-fleur.